My baby walked in to a record store
Hi-heels clickin' as she crossed the floor
Said to the manager, man alive
Do compact discs come on 45!
Snap, crackle and hiss
She needs her vinyl fix
She wants snap, crackle and hiss
Or it ain't no good for this miss

Now I'm in her Tiki room on the bed
78 a 45 through my head
Gave her a CD, said take me for a ride
Said uh-huh honey, there's no B-side
Snap, crackle and hiss
She needs her vinyl fix
She wants snap, crackle and hiss
Or it ain't no good for this miss

Took her for a ride, brand new Cadillac
Thought I'd impress her with my old 8-track
She screamed and she hollered like it was date rape
She said it ain't reel to reel, it ain't real tape
Snap, crackle and hiss
She needs her vinyl fix
She wants snap, crackle and hiss
Or it ain't no good for this miss

Well, she wants snap, crackle and hiss
She needs her vinyl fix
She wants snap, crackle and hiss
And red red lipstick kiss
She wants snap, crackle and hiss
Or it ain't no good for this miss